America Fights the Taliban with...Metal
Thursday, April 8, 2010 at 12:01AM Our fine U.S. special forces are using heavy metal to fight the Taliban. According to the AFP, the special, "hand-picked" metal play list annoys the Taliban. I must admit I find this hilarious. I'm a pacifist at all costs and I certainly don't believe in torture...but blasting some heavy metal certainly doesn't seem dangerous. Hell, if it pisses off some terrorists and literally sends them for the hills, then great.
The music and messages are blasted from speakers attached to an armored vehicle.
So what sort of bands are the American forces blasting? Just some Metallica, Offspring and Thin Lizzy. Not bad. (The military also blasts verbal threats to the Taliban during the heavy metal parties).
It's not clear if this "metal blast" is an official American military tactic. According to the AFP story, Lieutenant Colonel Brian Christmas (the commander of US Marines in northern Marjah, Afghanistan) didn't know of the music operation and he apparently doesn't like it, saying "It's inappropriate."
Reader Comments (8)
Once again, Al, you have outdone yourself with yet another fantastic topic.
Though war and torture are no laughing matters, the thought of torturing deserving, lousy no-goodnix of the world with Heavy Metal is not only a great idea but incidentally quite hilarious if you possess a twisted sense of humor.
Before going any further, tho, let me just say, Mark, thank you for your selfless service honoring and protecting our country.
I did a little Googling and found a great site, psywarrior.com. Let me add, I think Psywarrior would be a great name for a Metal band.
You know, one of those speed/thrash outfits that so many dudes on here secretly like better than Glam Metal, for some weird reason, since the stuff is generally devoid of any catchiness or cleverness for the most part.
C'mon, boys, you know who you are! We know what you really like... especially those neo-classical interludes that come in between all the hookless shredding, thrashing and dog barking.
I mean, c'mon, the stuff's so horrible, it's almost unbearable to the true Glam Metaller, though I know a lot of you claim to like it all. Frankly, it just baffles me how you can, cuz Thrash/Speed Metal really duz mostly kinda suck (okay, I like Overkill's cover of the Dead Boy's "Sonic Reducer" but that's about it)! Let's face it, the stuff mainly blows!
Which is precisely why it's ideal to use on our enemies than say, Poison's "Ain't Nothin' But A Good Time", tho I bet they would not be particularly fond of that particular musical selection, either.
Here's the kind of crap I would torture the Taliban and Al-Qaeda with, based on how torturous it is for me to listen to it, too! (So, I would rather not be part of the exercise personally as I would wind up tortured as well):
OSAMA'S MIX (Retro Edition)
1) Anthrax, "I Am The Law" (this is the worst band ever misclassified as Metal, it should just be known as "crap", plain and simple. Nice logo, tho.)
2) Slayer, "Chemical Warfare"
3) Megadeth, "Wake Up Dead"
4) Metallica, "To Live Is To Die"
5) Suicidal Tendencies, "I Saw Your Mommy"
6) Overkill, "Overkill"
7) Sodom, "Agent Orange"
8) Sepultura, "Troops Of Doom"
9) Kreator, "Pleasure To Kill"
10) Exciter, "Scream Bloody Murder"
11) Death Angel, "Final Death"
12) Annihilator, "Reduced To Ash"
13) Exodus, "And Then There Were None"
14) Merciful Fate, "Welcome Princes Of Hell"
Go to psywarrior.com and check out the PSYOP Loudspeaker Humvees and other loudspeaker set-ups we used on Noriega during "Operation Just Cause" in Panama.
Now that's a sound system!
I wonder who put this system together and can anyone fathom from the pictures featured on that site what kind of P.A.'s and speakers, etc. they used? Also what kind of decibels something like that could put out?
Here's a partial list of some of the Heavy Metal on the playlist used to torture Noriega in Panama as provided by the U.S. Southern Command Public Affairs Report about SouthCom Network Radio's involvement in Operation Just Cause:
1) Hell's Bells, AC/DC
2) You Got Another Thing Comin', Judas Priest
3) Don't Fear The Reaper, Blue Oyster Cult
4) Freedom Fighter, White Lion
5) Don't Close Your Eyes, Kix
6) Guilty, Bonham
7) Hang 'Em High, Van Halen
8) Heaven's On Fire, Kiss
9) In My Time of Dying, Led Zeppelin
10) Iron Man, Black Sabbath
11) Judgement Day, Whitesnake
12) No More Mr. Nice Guy, Alice Cooper
13) Hair Of The Dog, Nazareth
14) Panama, Van Halen (hahaha!!!)
15) Paradise City, Guns N' Roses
16) Run To The Hills, Iron Maiden
17) Stay Hungry, Twisted Sister
19) Youth Gone Wild, Skid Row
I had this roomate in the late 80's who claimed to be a former Vietnam civilian "Freelancer", if you know what I mean, based in Saigon. The guy told me stories so vivid I had to believe him.
So, I wonder if I could get a civilian Special Ops gig of "Heavy Metal Torture Programmer". I'd actually be willing to go on site with some of those Loudspeaker Humvees (check the pix on that web site, tellin' ya!) just to be able to crank it up and let the bast*rds have it!
But I would actually prefer to play stuff that I would personally enjoy as I would hope the troops I was with would, as well. It would give me great pleasure and personal satisfaction cranking this stuff up to the max in the name of God and Country...
So, here's that list:
BIN LADEN MIX, Set 1 (80's Retro Edition)
1) Damage, "Boots Of God" (rare Metal instrumental spoof by 80's punks)
2) Accept, "Balls To The Wall"
3) Lion, "Armed And Dangerous"
4) Spectre General (aka Kick Axe), "Nothin's Gonna Stand In Our Way"
5) Saxon, "Where The Lightning Strikes"
6) 220 Volt, "The Harder They Come"
7) Lizzy Borden, "Me Against The World"
8) WW III, "Children of The Revolution"
9) Wendy O. & Lemmy, "Stand By Your Man"
10) Smashed Gladys, "Eye For An Eye"
11) Cherrie Currie, "Cherry Bomb"
12) Lita Ford, "Kiss Me Deadly"
13) Vixen, "Cryin'"
14) Heart, "If Looks Could Kill"
15) Dokken, "Dream Warriors"
16) Vinnie Vincent Invasion, "Love Kills"
17) Dangerous Toys, "Scared"
18) Megadeth, "No More Mr. Nice Guy"
19) AC/DC, "Heatseeker"
20) Dirty Looks, "No Brains Child"
21) Accept (w/David Reece), "Generation Clash"
I could go on and on but you kinda get where I'm goin' with it. Oh, how I would love to be the DJ crankin' this kinda stuff up for Bin Laden before we captured him if they found him in those hills.
Of course, this is one thing we could probably skip farming out to Metal Mercenaries as I perhaps inappropriately envision myself. There are obviously plenty of qualified individuals in the U.S. Armed Forces who are already doing a fine job implementing Heavy Metal Torture initiatives.
Still, I sure would like to know what other nice folks on here would play if they were on the Special Ops Audio Torture Team, Heavy Metal Division...
p.s. Of course, you could just bypass all that and fly in Dickey Betts to perform "In Memory Of Elizabeth Reed" live, 10 times in a row, alternating shifts with ZZ Top, who could also be choppered in to play the entire "Fandango" album over and over again. Too bad Zappa isn't still around. The Pentagon could commission him to do a special concerto for Bin Laden, tho I doubt Zappa would take it as he was known for his strong anti-war stance. God Bless and Godspeed to our troops and that they may come home safe from Afghanistan and Iraq soon. And my prayers to all of our troops who died and who have been injured in the name of Liberty for all Americans and those all around the world who rely on our Forces for their safety.
Why not Offspring?
They are really a Heavy Metal band disguised as surf punks and their songs are perfect to taunt bad seeds like those of Al-Qaeda and the Taliban with titles like, "Bagdad" and "Come Out And Play".
Maybe it's just too controversial, dunno...
...or they're just not checkin' this comments section any more...
Well, regardless, here's Round 2 for me...
BIN LADEN METAL MIX, Volume II (80's/90's Retro Mix)
1) Riot, "Metal Soldiers"
2) Sweet Cheater, "All Fired Up"
3) Motley Crue, "Looks That Kill"
4) Priscilla, "Wake Up The Neighborhood"
5) Pretty Boy Floyd, "Leather Boyz with Electric Toyz"
6) Kix, "She Dropped Me The Bomb"
7) Accept, "Bound To Fail"
8) AC/DC, "Shoot To Thrill"
9) Scorpions, "Black Out"
10) Judas Priest, "Some Heads Are Gonna Roll"
11) Bronz, "Taken By Storm"
12) Winger, "Battlestations"
13) Cold Sweat, "Killing Floor"
14) Tuff, "Another Man's Gun"
15) Poison, "Play Dirty"
16) Vinnie Vincent, "Let Freedom Rock"
17) Steeler, "Hot On Your Heels"
18) AB/CD, "Your Name My Bullet"
19) Cinderella, "Nobody's Fool"
20) Unruly Child, "Lay Down Your Arms"
21) Junkyard, "Nowhere To Go But Down"
22) Roxx Gang, "Red Rose (On My Grave)"
Again, I could just go on and on...
I wonder what else we should play?
Don't know why more peeps didn't comment on this...
Oh, well, here's my latest playlist for a little "party" I'd like to DJ for our "friends" in Afghanistan. Mind you, I would only do this if I knew there would be no collateral damage during this operation...
BIN LADEN NU GLAM METAL MIX
1) Reckless Love, "Beautiful Bomb" (check this on YouTube!)
2) British Whale, "This Town Ain't Big Enough For The Both Of Us"
3) Steel Panther, "Death To All But Metal"
4) Airbourne, "Born To Kill"
5) Skillet, "Monster"
6) Guns n' Roses, "Shackler's Revenge"
7) Dynazty, "Lights Out In Candyland"
8) Vains Of Jenna, "Everybody Loves You When Your Dead"
9) Electric Mary, "One Foot In The Grave"
10) Mad Margritt, "Loaded Gun"
11) Stonerider, "Hair Of The Dog"
13) Five Finger Death Punch, "Bad Company"
1-blood on the bricks-aldo nova
2-bring the noise-anthrax and public enemy
3-i like it loud-illusion
4-fuck like a beast-wasp
5-number of the beast with full intro-iron maiden
6-nightmare in the neighborhood-pretty maids
7-#1 bad boy-poison
8-born in america-riot
9-reign of fire-armored saint
10-blow your speakers-manowar
hope you enjoy my torture lol
Torture indeed, Glamrocker Arch!
Especially "Bring The Noise", that lovely "duet" between Anthrax and Public Enemy. If that tortures me to no end, imagine what it will do to our enemies!
Aldo Nova's no slouch, either, when it comes to "tortured", which is what his voice is. He certainly has his place in the Annals of Hair Metal as a songwriter and guitarist (His "classic" song, "Fantasy", is often cited, for better or worse, as one of the earliest examples of the genre), but he still can't sing his way out of a paper bag.
p.s. Excellent list, my friend, as I have all of thoze except Illusion, "I Like It Loud" and Armored Saint, "Reign Of Fire", which I will check out now, but coming from you, chances are they're not only excellent weapons but interesting song as well!