Less Than a Dollar Glam

I'm broke, people.

The Glam mistress has got no cash. This doesn't stop me from searching for a Glam bargain now and then. I mean, I can usually scrape together a few dollars in case I happen upon a great Glam bargain.

I was in a music shop yesterday, pawing through the music books. A lot of the books were 50% off, but there wasn't anything I wanted...until I saw a Bonham book.

That's right: the music shop had Bonham's The Disregard of Timekeeping. Copyright 1989 thanks to our friends at Hal Leonard.

I grabbed the book instantly. At seven bucks, I figured I was looking at a steal. First off, you know I dig The Disregard of Timekeeping and second, vintage music books go for huge prices on eBay.

When I took my prize to the register, the man behind the counter gave me a funny look.

"Ha!" I thought. "I've owned you and this store with my great value!"

The same smirky clerk then said that since it was Saturday, all the clearance books were going for just a penny a page.

My book cost 79 cents.

Score!

I gloated the entire drive home. Glam, I love a bargain.

Discovering Metal in the War Zone

I've been a fan of Rachel Maddow ever since she started as a commentator on MSNBC. A push by Keith Olbermann - my favorite TV pundit, period - landed Maddow her own show. Aptly called The Rachel Maddow Show, Ms. Maddow breaks down the biggest political news of the day. She's a pundit - after all, Maddow is a liberal like me - so of course we'd get along great. Now, I wasn't surprised when Maddow's producers selected a story about the return of Heavy Metal to Baghdad. After all, Maddow is a progressive. I'm sure she likes to rock out like the rest of us. What did surprise me, however, is that a clip of the show popped up today on Blabbermouth.

Now, the point here is not that I'm excited a lot of kids are getting exposed to Maddow's show thanks to Blabbermouth. She's doing great in the ratings all on her own. The point is that it's great that Metal is finally beginning to seep back into Iraq. Metal musicians are largely shunned in conservative Baghdad - and it's dangerous for fans to gather at underground concerts. Getting bands - and fans - back together in Iraq is a great thing! Perhaps someday it will be safe enough for our Glam bands to travel to Iraq for shows.

From the reading and research I've done, there's a big pocket of die hard Metalheads in Iraq. Those kids (and some adults) love Metallica and Motley Crue just like we do. Sure, the Metal that is born from the region tends to be super heavy. Then again, I wouldn't expect a Sunset Strip party tune to originate in the middle of a war zone.

I wonder if the constant occupation of allied forces in the region has anything to do with the rise of Metal's popularity? A lot of our fine enlisted men and women take music from home with them to the war zone as a way to cope and relax. If I was an Iraqi and I heard, say, Megadeth blasting from a tanker for a the first time, I'd definitely be intrigued. I'd want to discover the music and find a way to own some of the forbidden fruit. Better yet, I'd want to share this new found glory with my friends.

Seeing Rachel throw up the devil horns on network television is about as awesome as it gets. The only thing that would excite me more...is if Tom Brokaw does the same during tomorrow's pre-election edition of Meet the Press. Something tells me I have a better shot at winning the lottery than seeing old Tom make the international sign of Metal. Ah, a girl can dream.

Picture It: Halloween, 1998...with Motley Crue

Back in 1998, Motley Crue performed a Halloween show. Apparently, Nikki and Tommy wore their 1984 Shout-era make-up for the event.

The band sounds tight as hell in this clip. I was a senior in high school when this clip was made. Wish I would have been at the show...

Motley Crue- Wildside - Halloween 1998

Halloween is So Metal

It's finally Halloween!

Halloween is my favorite holiday - always has been, really. The costumes and the candy are great. Of course, Halloween is also straight Metal.

As a genre, Metal is often regarded as "underground." Of course, this isn't exactly accurate. The Glam 80s really opened all Metal acts to the mainstream and - for the most part - Metal never really returned to the underground (thanks to the Internet). The popularity has waxed and waned - but there are still plenty of bands out there keeping Metal strong.

I'll roll with the stereotype, but I don't find anything "scary" or "dangerous" about Metal. Hell, maybe it is the lifestyle, although that doesn't phase me much either. The only two things that truly freak me out are 1) a musician's messy apartment and 2) copious drug use. Other than that, I'm good. I suppose if you want to get theoretical and do numerology, we can bring up Iron Maiden. I mean, Iron Maiden did release an album called The Number of the Beast back in 1982. I guess there is also dark imagery in Metal. Then there's all those dragons that Dio likes to slay...  

So what are the so-called scariest Metal albums of all time?

Here's my top Halloween list - in no particular order:

The Number of the Beast - Iron Maiden
Shout at the Devil - Motley Crue
Love it to Death - Alice Cooper
Blizzard of Ozz - Ozzy Osbourne
Antichrist Superstar - Marilyn Manson
...and anything by Undercover Slut or Mayhem

Play all these albums at your Halloween party and I guarantee you'll be a Metal hero.

Here's "The Number of the Beast." Watch it while eating a chocolate bar and playing air guitar. You know, the way the devil intended.

Songs to Cruise

When I was younger, cruising around a certain city block was huge in my town.

I mean, I'm from Main Street U.S.A. You think of perfect small town America? I'm from that town. From my world view, the kids I went to school with were from great homes - and I'm talking parents here, not bricks and mortar. Of course, we all have our problems, but these were (are) good people. My high school football team was strong - yes, we had back to back perfect seasons. The cheerleaders were attractive. Students were competitive honor-roll wise.

Yes, I'm from Main Street U.S.A.

So, Main Street U.S.A. didn't have much action on a Friday or Saturday night. There were two options for dates: the movies and cruising.

In that instance, I would always choose movies. To be honest, cruising used to always bore me to tears. I mean, how many times can a person drive around the same city block, stuck in traffic?

The answer is a lot of times!

The only good part about cruising...was the music. When I was really "young," Glam was the biggest music of the day. At this age, I wasn't crusing with friends. More like riding through town with my parents - but you could easily hear the music waft from the cars. Years later, I cruised for real - and controlled the music, too.

There are some songs that just beg to be played in a car. Fast and loud is usually a prerequisite - of course, that's just my opinion. I know some people don't like a big racket while driving. I've never lived that way.

My top 10 cruising songs (and yeah, I threw in a couple modern tunes):

Toys in the Attic - Aerosmith
Public Enemy #1 - Motley Crue
Get It While It's Hot - Kix
Runnin' With the Devil - Van Halen
It's Hot Tonight - Alice Cooper
Unholy Confessions - Avenged Sevenfold
Rebel Yell - Billy Idol
Guilty - Bonham
Crazy Bitch - Buckcherry
The Last Mile - Cinderella

The only rule is that, of course, "The Last Mile" must be played at the end of the cruise. Or when you run out of gas. You know, whichever comes first.

What are your top 10 cruising tunes?

Kix at Rock Gone Wild!

I don't like posting press releases, but since I wrote this one and we're talking about my beloved Kix, you all get to read and enjoy. That's right, kiddos: Kix are headed to Iowa. Get your tickets. Don't make me stand in a field and drink cans of beer alone.

Of course, if I was alone, I'd have a better chance of hanging out with Kix, wouldn't I?

On second thought, stay home!

Nah, I'm kidding.

Maybe.

ALGONA, IOWA (October 28, 2008) - The "dirty boys of the underground," east coast rockers Kix, are set to bring their high-energy stage antics to America's heartland. Kix will play the inaugural Rock Gone Wild festival in Algona, Iowa August 20-23, 2009.

Founded in a Hagerstown, Maryland basement about three decades ago, Kix are known for an over-the-top show - complete with choreography! Kix take the phrase "hop, skip and a jump" to a completely new level. Band members made a name for themselves in the mid 1980s with a string of videos on MTV and the hit single "Don't Close Your Eyes" featured on the popular album Blow My Fuse. East coast fans know Kix intimately. Their New Year's Eve shows at Hammerjacks are stuff of legend. Now, fans outside the eastern seaboard get the chance to experience real rock energy up close and personal. Kix are Steve Whiteman (vocals), Brian "Damage" Forsythe (guitar), Ronnie "10/10" Younkins (guitar), Mark Schenker (bass) and Jimmy "Chocolate" Chalfant (drums).

Kix join Dangerous Toys, Saigon Kick, Rhino Bucket, Helix and Junkyard to the constantly expanding Rock Gone Wild lineup. Visit www.rockgonewild.com or www.anatomyofafestival.wordpress.com for updated festival information.

Rock Gone Wild fans are able to purchase tickets at all three price levels: platinum, VIP and general admission. Platinum ticket holders are allowed exclusive access to the Sinners Lounge. The Sinners Lounge features buffet style lunch, dinner and nightly snacks daily; liquor and beer, soft drinks and water - all to enjoy in an air conditioned tent. The Sinners Lounge is the perfect nightclub setting for all rock fans! Platinum ticket holders sit in the first ten rows.

VIP ticket holders also get special Rock Gone Wild privileges. These ticket holders will sit in rows 11-30, enjoy buffet style lunch, dinner and late night snacks daily, plus beer, soft drinks and water. VIP fans will enjoy their food and drink in air-conditioned tents. General admission tickets are also available. To purchase tickets, please visithttp://tickets.rockgonewild.com/.

Rock Gone Wild will take place at the FreedomPark festival grounds, located at 2507- 160^th Avenue in Algona, Iowa.

Rock now. Rock on. Rock wild.

***

I Remember You (Insert Sob Here)

Here is a great confession for you: every time I hear Skid Row's "I Remember You" I want to bawl.

Like a baby.

From the guitar solo beginning, to Sebastian Bach's high notes... the song makes me an emotional disaster.

I was feeling particularly sad and lonely last night - so what do I do? I put on "I Remember You" and torture myself.

"Remember yesterday/walking hand in hand/love letters in the sand/I remember you."

These lyrics, people, are the stuff of real Glam.

It's also apparently the stuff that makes the Glam mistress sappy.

You must understand I'm a hardened bad ass. Nothing phases me. I don't cry at movies. Or weddings. Or funerals. Heather moved halfway across the country last week. I didn't cry then either. Well, neither did she. At least she didn't around me. That's not how I roll.

Again, I'm a hardened bad ass.

Still, give me Sebastian Bach and a guitar solo I've heard more times than my own name and I'm reduced to blubber.

Maybe I'm emotionally unstable.

Ok, so I'm emotionally unstable.

"You're my darling/I love you."

Classic.

You see, I think my emotional attachment to this song has something to do with my past. I'm not exactly sure what happened in my past - but something has always triggered a "sadness switch" in my brain whenever I hear this song. Yes, it happens when I hear the song live, too.

The video for "I Remember You" isn't that spectacular from a concept point of view. Still, it gets the idea across - and, apparently - I got the idea big time when I was a kid. There are a few songs that trigger the "sadness switch" but none are quite as powerful as "I Remember You."

I think on some level, songs like "I Remember You" are what put the initial spark in my brain to write. Now, I've accomplished sad little as a writer, but I keep plugging along. I guess I feel like someday I might be able to move people with words on a page like Skid Row were able to move me - through music - so long ago.

It isn't very often that music and lyrics come together to create a perfect emotional storm. Sure, there are songs that make us happy. There are songs that make us violent. Then there are songs that make us feel.